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Yeah yeah we get it, Newton will fry your hand and pls don’t cook a chicken to 205°C core temp.
BUT! What kinda physics major forgets Newton AND the fact that you won’t convert kinetic energy into heat with 100% efficiency?
I know, three math majors in a trench coat, that’s who’ll forget it.
Gotta love how everyone forgot about Newton in all this. Enjoy your instantly well-cooked hand, which is also made of meat.
Double the food. Sweet!
My man, if you slapped something at 32,000 miles per hour, you don’t have a hand to cook anymore :P
As your friendly neighborhood person with knowledge about food and cooking, 2 pounds is an absurd weight for an uncooked rotisserie chicken, that is a very small and cooked weight, 4-6 pounds is going to be typical. Also, more importantly, you cannot cook something faster by increasing the temperature past a pretty quick point, meat is an excellent insulator. No slap can cook the inside of a frozen chicken unless the entire chicken disintegrates.
Tbf though, a slap at 3700 mph would absolutely disintegrate the chicken.
Also, if you cooked it to 400 degrees it would be disgusting. You just need to cook it to 165. This guy might know about physics but he has never cooked anything before.
Speak for yourself, I love a good carbonized chicken
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Shredded chicken it is
And your hand
Lord have mercy on folks cooking their chicken to 400 F. Those birds will come out as dry as the sands of the Sahara.
Yes that is about 2.5 times the recommended safe temp. I am not going the math though.
Only ~40% higher - make sure to use absolute units when taking a ratio of temperatures.
https://youtu.be/hzMzFGgmQOc?t=285
“well done steaks. if I see a speck of red, it’s going back. you better cook my food”.
Signed, a well done meat enjoyer.
I mean, false equivalency, don’t you think? I have yet to meet an enjoyer of medium-rare chicken, probably because the Salmonella or Listeria already took them out
Where’s the link to the YouTube video where someone tried this? I remember listening to it last time someone posted this.
Typical physicist, ignoring enthalpy of phase changes. Starting from 1C defrosted makes a huge difference from 0C as the melting takes up a ton more energy/slaps. Their underslapped chicken would give you salmonella
They haven’t considered rate of slap. Significant heat transfer to environment even at 10 slaps per second.
They’re also assuming sea level standard atmospheric conditions. You may need to reduce rate of slap at altitude.
Also only about half the heat goes into the chicken and the other half into the hand used for slapping
This assumes both have the same amount of heat capacity * mass. A hand with heat insulating gloves would also significantly reduce heat loss.
Better do it in a vacuum though, you’ll lose energy to air resistance
I believe we’re well on our way to developing the worlds first slap coefficient.
Also completely neglecting that not all the energy in a slap will be transferred to thermal energy in the chicken.
Assume a spherical chicken…
Slap the salmon
And the phase change from uncooked to cooked.
Where do I find cooked in the phase diagram?
🤔
A guy on YT actually tried it experimentally a few years ago (how many slaps, not how fast one slap); and it works to some degree! The main problem becomes to make a slapping machine that can survive long enough:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHFhnnTWMgI&pp=ygURc2xhcCBjb29rIGNoaWNrZW7SBwkJzgkBhyohjO8%3D
He also did a turkey a couple years after that for “slapsgiving”
YouTube is truly a wonder of stupidity. Sometimes in good ways
This slap question was a big meme several years ago, and when that video came out (years after the meme), it was an instant hit.
The fact that this discussion is still going shows how popular it is
IDK, might be laying the groundwork for future kinetic cookers.
No one’s going to point out the absurd starting assumption KE=mcT??
Why is that absurd?
You need a perfect transfer of the kinetic energy to the chicken for that to hold, not a slap
i love fully inelastic chicken
Yeah that’s the part that erks me the most. Ain’t no way that chicken is staying together.
And no heat losses from slapping the chicken either
And they’re not accounting for any amount of cooling between slaps. What’s the ambient temp? What’s the rate of slap?
Fucking nerds in the commentsl love it
But how do you get the chicken back from the stratosphere once you’ve slapped it that fast?
Lmao
You start in the stratosphere and slap it down towards the Earth.
Smh it’s like these people have never slapped a chicken before
Better to slap it twice at half strength so that it’s cooked when you catch it.
Bro really wanted his chicken well done at 400°F
Naw, that’s burnt.
Maillard reaction where things brown starts at 350f.
More than 165/175 in the center and that’s dried out.
The mallard reaction is only relevant when cooking duck.
I saw your username first.
Then I misread the rest as a Mallard Reaction.
that only happens in ducks
I thought about making an intentional joke about being the “mallard reaction” and saying “isn’t that quackers” or something, and decided to not confuse people.
If you spatchcock your bird then you’ve only gotta slap your cock to about 150°F at the thickest part of breast
naturally. Best to slow it down and keep it juicy, too. I like smoking them at about 200 f, it’s perfection.
also… way to make spatchcocking sound even dirtier than it is. the no cooks here are probably thinking it’s some sort of sex act and the rest of us are wondering if it’s not also some sort of sex act.
spatchcocked birds also kinda look like a random roadkill animal to the ignorant, idk if you care about who sees you grillin
This is why you carve before getting to the table. Or at least break it into parts.
Is that less or more the energy of your average Falcon Punch?
What if I wanted to cook the chicke through friction, by say inserting an object 3 fingers or so thick in and out of its cavity as fast as athletically possible? … so um… how long can I keep fucking my chicken?
alternatively, how long do I have to keep choking my chicken to cook it?
Math says it’ll take more than 2 minutes, so unfortunately it’s out of reach for you
Cook your hand too 😄
Your hand would disintegrate long before you slap it enough to cook it
The chicken has to exceed the boiling point of water for it to be cooked? Unless we’re making chicken caramels, I don’t think so.
Doing some math, I think it works out to 6,242 slaps or a single slap at 1,939 mph. Much more attainable.
That 205C would just be the surface temperature of the chicken, not the average. Note that the calculation doesn’t take into account the volume or radius
EDIT: No, I’m wrong. The calculation is for boiling the whole chicken. Who was this written by, a Brit?
Are you sure? The numbers in the
tweetreddit post talk about total mass and heat capacity. So I think that means the entire bulk has that average temperature.See my edit
One thing’s for sure: a chicken slapped at 3726 mph won’t be very tasty. Or look too good.
slap
It won’t be a chicken anymore, Instant mist
What, you don’t like
vaporizedionized poultry?
Who was this written by, a Brit?
Nope. Likely an American.
When cooking, people in general like to use round numbers, like “200°C”, since a difference of 5°C in oven temperature is not a big deal.
And yet they went with some oddly specific 205°C. That only makes sense if they’re used to Fahrenheit, eyeballed a round value (like 400°F), converted it into Celsius (204.4°C), and then rounded it up to discard the decimal.
I’m also going to say they’re completely clueless when it comes to cooking - 200°C is the oven temperature. The chicken itself reaches a far lower temperature, in the 70~80°C range. By the time the chicken reached 200°C, it’s already dry and close to catching fire. (The self-ignition temperature for biological stuff is typically between 200°C and 250°C.)
Just strap your hand open palm while riding a asteroid travelling at 10-20mps
Single slap assumes all kinetic into heat, which isn’t. Alot is lost to the slap sound, alot more is lost into the flying bits of pulverised chicken bits.
Yes. I think, at these speeds, you have to model the chicken as a liquid.
Then might have to model for the chicken splash and chicken cavitation.
