Context: I’m 19 and have had my driver’s license since last summer. I was never interested in driving, but my family pressured me into signing up for driving school (they said it’s a basic skill), so I did it and got my license - somehow - despite never feeling safe or in control behind the wheel during the learning process. I haven’t driven much since then, but on the few occasions I did, I still felt out of control. Two weeks ago, I had a pretty bad car accident due to failing to yield the right of way (I struggle with multitasking). I got hit by two cars. Thankfully, my boyfriend was with me. He’s a bit older and much more confident, extroverted, brave, and uninhibited - he managed to handle the situation with the other drivers and deal with all the protocols for me because I was completely overwhelmed and just crying. Thankfully, no one was hurt, so I only got my license suspended for 60 days, a fine, and I have to pay for the damages. My dad settled all of that already. Now I don’t want to ever drive again. But my dad says it’s fine and that every driver gets into an accident at some point.
By multitasking I meant I have difficulty doing multiple things at once - in this instance specifically I was only looking forward & forgot to check the sides before joining the traffic. I feel like if I take my eyes from what’s in front of me I lose control of the car such as when checking the sides / mirrors or dashboard.
I still remember one time as I was a new driver, I saw a friend in the other lane, and I told my parents, “look, there’s my friend!” And I looked over at her, and started accidentally turning my car into the direction I was looking.
My parents quickly told me to drive straight, and I got control of the car again, but this goes to show that it IS a skill to be able to look around, at mirrors, at the blind spot, etc, without also moving the steering wheel. But you will get better at it with more practice and especially good experienced drivers or instructors helping you practice.
While I don’t know your situation, this is fairly common in new drivers. For most of us, experience gets us past the issue. Experience to make driving habits automatic rather than something we need to be anxious about. I watched both of my teens get much better at this over time, but I’m still very anxious about them.
This makes me seriously question the level of testing required to get a licence where you are. By that I mean that by the standards I’m used to you were wildly under prepared for driving on the open road and shouldn’t have been put in that situation until you were ready.
It took me three attempts to pass my driving test. I could actually operate a car just fine for all of them but it wasn’t until the third that I was actually ready to be on the roads unsupervised. There is a lot going on and until you’ve built up the experience and habits to do it safely it’s… A lot.
I think I was also 19 when I got my licence but didn’t really drive at all until I was in my mid 30s. I always lived places it simply wasn’t necessary. If if stayed there then I doubt I’d have ever got a car. I find driving incredibly tedious.
That’s just something that comes from experience. Eventually checking everything will be muscle memory and the anxiety will lessen.
My partner and I had a habit of treating merges as teamwork. Driver focuses on front, copilot looks back/sideways, and driver implicitly trusts when copilot says “go”. We were pretty slick with our merges.
To equivocate, we have since relocated to a city with good enough public transit that we were able to ditch our car entirely. Life is definitely better this way.